Pagtatapat ng Isang Tagahimig

Kung hindi man sasapat ang paghimig,

hayaang buhay ko'y sa 'Yo maiawit.

Hindi ko na lubos maalala kung paano kumalabit sa isip ko ang mga titik na ito. Tipikal na araw iyon. Habang naghihintay na maikabit ang mga pyesa ng bagong kompyuter na binili ay minabuti ko nang mananghali muna sa isang malapit na kainan. Nilabas ko ang kwaderno at isinatinta ang mga linyang patula na nangungulit sa aking diwa ilang minuto na. Para sa apat na saknong, kapos pa sa ibig kong porma upang lumapat sa damdamin ng himig na matagal nang nagsusumigaw sa isang sulok ng aking kaisipan. "Aayusin ko na lang sa bahay." Sabi ko sa sarili ko.

Tulad ng usang uhaw sa tubig ng batis,

Ang aking kaluluwa sa 'Yo'y nananabik.

Nakapananariwang manalangin sa awit ng aking Unang Pakikinabang. Sa tuwing ako'y nagsisimba at ito ang kinakanta ng koro, nanunumbalik nang bigla ang apoy ng paghahangad na paglingkuran Siya. Siya na pinangakuan kong magiging matalik kong kaibigan buhat pa noong nasa ikalimang baitang pa lang ako. "As the deer..." ang himig ng mga paslit na tinig, umaawit na para kang pinaaalalahanang Siya ang una kong inasam bago pa man dumating ang maraming bagay sa aking buhay.

Hindi ko alam kung paano nangyari ang lahat. Naging bahagi ako ng korong sa dalumat ko lang tinangkang sabayang awitan. Nakatagpo ako ng mga taong nagustuhan ang mga himig ko. Napabilang ako sa isang pangkat ng magkakaibigang patuloy na nagpapaalala na sa kabila ng pagdududa ko sa aking sarili, naniniwala ang Diyos sa akin. Napasama ako sa mga taong nagsabing, "Sumulat ka pa nang marami!" sa panahong halos pinaslang ko na ang paniniwalang kapos ang aking kayang ibigay bilang manunulat at mang-aawit.

Sa pagbubunsod ng ikawalong album ng Hangad, maraming nabuksan sa akin. Saklaw nito hindi lamang ang pagiging mang-aawit at kompositor ko kundi maging ang pagiging tao sa kabuuan. Nanood ang mga tao ng dalawang konsiyerto. Nagbilihan ng kani-kaniyang sipi ng album. Ako naman, sa huling nota ng pangwakas na awitin, babaunin ko ang mga pagkatuto sa mga susunod na proyekto. Narinig ko na at naangkin ang mga salita ng Panginoon sa minsan naming pag-uusap. "Sapat ang biyaya ko para sa iyo kaya huwag mo itong pagdudahan."

Excited!

I just got a very good news I have been praying for so long. A friend posted a link naming the short-listed applicants for the 2nd Elements National Singing and Songwriting Camp (http://7101musicnation.com.ph/news/shortlist). I was so happy when I learned this. I was in the office though so I wasn't able to shout it out. LOL. Right now I am just very excited for the audition. We're 60 in the list and they're taking only 30 participants from the songwriting category. I do hope that you'll be praying with me so I may make it to this camp. One more step and I'm in!

Oh Lord You are marvelous.

Kanugon

Sayang.

What word in English corresponds to this exactly? That is how I feel for not writing experiences for the past few months. Yeah I am always busy but it's not worth missing it if you know your stories are meant to be shared.

I wasn't able to write since March. That means I missed narrating my Easter Season activities when I shifted my ministry focus to Hangad. I didn't write about the MAS-MRAP Reunion which is the highlight of my Holy Week.  The Holy Week itself! Oh God this is too much for being late.

Two office team buildings have passed. The singing workshop. The wedding gigs. The start of This Time With You album recording. M two songs in the album. My first recorded solo. The Microsourcing Mardi Gras. The Punta Fuego R&R. My trip to Guimaras Island which marked my many firsts. The workshops Hangad conducted in three parishes already. My first billiard experience. My driving lessons. My new pet Samuel. The psalm I wrote and sing for St. Philomena. The first jingle I sold to a TV show. My first mountain peak. My first ice skating experience. My new friends from Singles for Family and Life. The release of This Time With You cd and songbook. My comeback to serving at the altar after months of recording. The concert last week which was a blast. My new compositions from the melodies springing up while climbing the mountain, staring blankly at the bus window, and while taking my dog for a walk. I also wanted to write about the Filipino language. Also about the current socio-political issues.

Ok. Tonight. I mean Today, September 8. I promise to write all that is worth sharing in this blog. Be it in conversational Filipino, trying hard Hiligaynon or Kiniray-a, casual English or poetic Tagalog, I shall not hesitate to write again. I should have known that an artist's discipline is writing at least a line or two everyday. I have forgotten being an artist for quite a while. It should not happen again.

Life is a celebration. Life is joyful! Ang imo nga kalipayon, imo nga ihatag. (Is this a correct Hiligaynon, Ma?) :p

Why do we fast and abstain?

You walk because you know where you are going. You reach for something with your hand, eat your favourite dessert and watch your much-loved primetime series. We do things because we think. And this combination of thought, memory, emotion, imagination and will are proofs that man is not only a mortal being but a spiritual one connected into something greater than what we see and feel. In fact, we think first before we even move our body. Our physical being, ideally, obeys what the human spirit commands.

This proves that our spiritual nature is superior to the body. Lucifer knows this. And this is the root of his envy. As a light-bearer, he knew that the immaterial should be greater than the material. He could not accept God’s order that angels should serve man, especially bow down to the mortal form of God, Jesus Christ. His envy turned to rage that he decided to destroy material creation by tempting the greatest masterpiece of The Almighty, man. This is the reason why temptation exists, to mutilate the race of man.

How is this connected with today’s liturgy? We, as mortal beings, are confined to this world of temptation. Human as we are, we tend to follow what our body wants first before considering what our spirit commands. And this is how we let Satan ruin our lives, when we let our worldly desires prevail. The ash on the forehead is simply but a reminder that this life is temporary, that we are spiritual being first, a concept that was realized when God, out of His abounding generosity, let us live. Fasting and abstinence stress that it is not the body that is greater than the soul. Our spirit dictates what our body should do, not the other way around. If we decide to do the latter, we let Satan ruin us because he can only destroy our being through our material nature. This, I think, is the message of self-denial for the Lenten season: To tame our bodies that it may follow what the soul desires.

In this forty day journey of fasting, prayer and alms-giving, may our prayer be like the song of David after Prophet Nathan rebuked him.

Create in me a pure heart, O God,
   and renew a steadfast spirit within me.
 Do not cast me from your presence
   or take your Holy Spirit from me.
Restore to me the joy of your salvation
   and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.

                         (Psalm 51:7-9 - New International Version)

Michael Voris, Jason Evert and The Battle Against Catholic Zombies

Talking about Christian reinforcement? Aside from my favorite Father Robert Barron, why not try Michael Voris and Jason Evert? I have always loved my Catholic faith with all its wonderful doctrines but these two speakers add so much spices to it that really blew me away. They just had their separate series of talks here in the Philippines and I just can't contain the enjoyment of listening to them so I'd rather write this entry.

Michael Voris on Truth and Dare Conference

Michael Voris is one of the most articulate doctrinal speaker there is. An Emmy award winning news reporter, he surely has that power to bring forth a deeper understanding of the faith responding to a range of trivial questions about basic religious instructions up to profound inquiries on apologetics. The best thing about this guy is that he strikes the mere legion of darkness inside the Church! And he does it with so much eloquence. No wonder some clergy doesn't like him. Or should I say, some clergy hate him. This man can actually make me believe that reincarnation can be a Catholic thing. Why? I think he is the John the Baptism of this generation. And we really need one.

Nat with Jason Evert

Now, who thinks chastity talks are full of clichéd arguments by old-fashioned speakers? Well, you better try Jason Evert. He has the most gifted tongue on issues of sex, marriage, relationships, vocation and morality. Holding a masters degree in theology, this guy is sure to rock your world with his gift of spontaneous words. He gives a barrel of laughs yet you might not notice how easily he brings you that awe feeling in every minute of his talk. If you are planning to hear his stories, expecting a preachy don't-do-this-because piece, you are in for a big surprise. He is usually accompanied by her wife Crystalina, also a very gifted chastity speaker. I have  just attended Jason Evert's last talk, in this particular tour, here in the Philippines and I got one word for him: Awesome!


I have always been in loved with Roman Catholicism. And even as I may fall into the lure of secularism, at least I know God's prophets of this new generation are just a click away. You may catch Michael Voris on www.theonetruefaith.tv and http://realcatholictv.org/. And of course check out Jason Evert's talks in faith and entertainment combo on www.chastity.com and www.catholic.com.

A Call for Another Revolution: An EDSA Baby’s Point of View

Everything transpired from February 22-25, 1986. And I feel proud being born on that fateful Saturday, the first day of the historical peaceful revolution that surprised the world and inspired other nations. I have been taught about the values, spirit and stories behind those photos of tanks, praying nuns, barricading civilians, yellow ribbons, and other spine-tingling images of those days. My mother told me that my Tatay wanted to join the rally but she was due that day and we were based in Olongapo then. So while my mom was in the hospital to deliver her first born, the rest of the Filipinos are marching in the streets, braving the circumstances of another make or break scenario as one people.

On its first anniversary, my family went to Manila to celebrate with fellow Filipinos. I can’t remember it vividly but pictures show yellow ribbons everywhere. My mother has been the passionate one in telling wonderful stories behind those pictures. During the Mount Pinatubo eruption, we had to transfer to Makati where I spent most of my childhood years. I was in the fourth grade when I received a good news. All the EDSA babies were called as a part of the 11^th anniversary celebration. I had this jubilant feeling not only for being one of those few privileged kids, but basically because of the patriotic upbringing I had. We had a tour inside Malacañang, had lunch with the President at Libingan ng mga Bayani, and had a cozy seat during the program in Camp Crame. It felt ecstatic! I was in awe.

People who took part in that significant event might share all the most memorable experiences with all the emotions streaming in every intensely epitomized encounter written. And yet, you feel that no single word could really embody that ardent spirit when you try reading the accounts on how people prayed, how soldiers got off the tanks, how they felt the Blessed Mother’s guidance, etc. It was an event of high hopes in the hearts of every nationalistic Filipino. It was an unexpected unity of people from different walks of life. It was a proof of how Filipinos are capable of doing.

Today, we celebrate that very day, a quarter of century ago, when we were able to topple a dictator. For me, EDSA People Power still has the same message over the years. It proved that Filipinos are able to carry out the mission of transformation. And that event happened because each individual who participated, decided for himself and stood for what he thought was better for him and for the nation. Transformation comes from within. It is a decision. We can still go to the streets together but that would not change anything considering the present context. Thus, if we want change, we are called for another revolution on a different level. Change in this nation happens when each one becomes open to the decision of self-transformation. We may blame the government and the corrupt Filipinos but at the end of the day, it’s the decision within that matters on how we live our life. If everyone considers hating the acts of injustice, imprudence and corruption, national transformation follows. Yes it is easier said than done. But EDSA has shown that we can do something for ourselves.

One year old Nat with mama
and cousin on February 25, 1987

I wasn’t named Gringo, Cory, Fidel, Enrile, Epifanio or Ferdinand. I know someone who was named after a combination of two from those. After all, even if I could have been born on some other dates, I am still a proud Filipino because of EDSA. Because being a Filipino means loving freedom and being capable of change.

Lessons from the Christmas Pickpockets

Last night I lost my wallet while striding along the Guadalupe night market. I was bound to Cubao so I took the broader part of the side walks which is near the road. When I reached the MRT Station, I discovered my backpack's front pocket was unzipped. "Oh Lord", I mumbled. Then I felt my body froze for few seconds.

I lost my first Italian Leather wallet. Stingy as I am, I don't buy wallet for myself. I only had one because my grandfather, whose based in Nevada, left it here in our home around two years ago. I only used it this year when my mother, who kept his stuff, noticed that my previous one, which was gifted to me and I was using since college, has already worn out. She handed me the handsome slick brown leather wallet.

There I put every cards that would fit. Enclosed were my IDs: SSS, TIN, National Library, and my most valued YFC and altar server ID's which I have been keeping since high school. Of course my other important cards were there, stuff like bank cards, health card, reward cards and regretfully, my Time Zone card. Lol. I had three thousand cash in my wallet which I was about to use for my second batch of shopping for my inaanaks.

That night also, I was scouting for a good model to replace my Nokia 1100. I had a good budget in mind. Now, I might as well delay the purchase. My penny-pinching attitude was not moved by the incident. People would suggest me to compensate what was lost and that its time to indulge myself to a nice gadget. But hey, my new year's resolution last year was to avoid being impulsive since I have a big deal of expenses at home. This incident is actually teaching me to be more responsible on every aspect.

One lesson on being responsible is "Don't tolerate those pickpockets". If you're reading this, keep watch of your belongings when you're walking around the metro, riding the train or even just by staying in a public place. Learn from me so you won't learn it the hard way as I did.

There was an hour of denial stage. Thanks to a friend who saw me staring aimlessly on the way. He treated me a bite and accompanied me to the police station to report. After having my cards blocked, it dawned on me how lucky I am. First, I didn't have to resort to those kind of things so I can feed my family. The good Lord gave me a good job and He can actually give me more than the amount I lost exactly the day after. Second, I wasn't hurt. I can't imagine another trauma of a mugging experience. I can tell because I had a terrible one way back in college.

I am simply blessed. I hope the one who stole my wallet will be blessed too! Honestly, I pray that this will be the last Christmas he or she will be stealing for their food in Noche Buena.

Semper Gratias Ago

Mediatrix

I don't know what's with the Blessed Virgin Mary but everytime I offer a mass for her, I find myself drawing closer to God. That even as I try to control my life away from Jesus, BVM inspires me to keep on track. I always remember December 8 as a date of redeeming myself. Even in the past years, I find myself at the gloomiest sorrow of remorse the day before the Immaculate Conception, only to be reminded that God loves me so.

You know what, Blessed Mother? Whatever it is inside my heart that makes your inspiring presence prevail, just let it be. I love God. And perhaps you are the biggest factor that taught me how to.

Oh Mary conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse to thee. Amen

Campaign Against Child Abuse

One of the best and I suppose the most nostalgic campaigns I've joined on Facebook is the recent Campaign Against Child Abuse. It brings back all the childhood memories which was very effective (for those who have FB) to make it a personal endeavor on ending child abuse. Pictures from Walt Disney, Looney Toons, Marvel Heroes, Capcom, Japanese Anime, Manga, and other Tagalized Western Cartoons have dominated the site. It brings back all those theme songs we memorized, the names of the shows we almost forgot, the favorite characters from the most comic to the poignant ones, the superheroes we imitate in words and acts when we play with our neighbors and most of all the memories of being a child, when all you think about was to play, obey your parents and discreetly break the rules.

In a post from whatisthetrend.net written by Ed Pudol, it is mention that this campaign started in Greece and Cyprus last November 16 with the same goal. Now it has gone more than its original purpose and conquered other countries simply because the idea is a lot of fun. We do not only help in spreading the advocacy but we also help ourselves be reminded of the rights of every child.

We were all once a child. Every child deserves to have a normal and healthy environment. This campaign is a call for us to give the just treatment for the next generation of this world. Let's not deprive them of what they deserve for a good foundation in life.